I forgave someone once.

They had a different countenance that day. The bubbly, full-of-joy person I saw one day didn’t show up that day. That day they were embarrassed, and maybe a little sad.

The last time I saw them, they were joyful and singing in church. That day they were solemn, and confessing that they had done something wrong.

But I believe that the joyful person from the first day was still in there. Today they were just covered up by the pain that sometimes comes with telling the truth.

Appearances can be deceiving.

Because maybe that joyful person in church was covering up the solemn person that sometimes does things that are wrong. And maybe that day the solemn person was covering up the joyful one that is usually there. I don’t really know how they “usually” are. And the truth is that it doesn’t really matter.

Someone once said (in reference to those of us in the Church) that we just clean up really well.

Because sometimes I am the joyful one singing to Jesus on Sunday morning. (All the while, knowing about the not-so-great choices I have made.)

And sometimes I am the solemn one knowing that I don’t always make the best choices. (All the while, knowing the freedom that comes with the light.)

The difference is my bad choices usually stay in the dark. And that day, theirs was brought into the light.

And the really beautiful thing is that there is freedom in that light. Though they may not feel it right away.

Because sometimes it’s like when your eyes have to take some time to adjust to the light after they’ve been in the dark.

Especially if it’s been awhile.

But in the light there is warmth & love. And hopefully that’s what they remember from that day.

Short Film – Levi’s “Go Forth” from John Carl on Vimeo.

Thanks Justin

(It’s sort of like stopping to smell the roses.)

I was walking back from the store today (where I went to replace my stolen cell phone-more on that later.)

I was walking down Cherry St. back to our house (about a mile). There is a bookstore that always has boxes of books out front on the sidewalk. Maybe it was because I just watched “You’ve Got Mail”…maybe it was because it was a beautiful day & I was enjoying my walk back home. But I decided to stop & peruse the books outside today.

There were several titles…mostly new-agey titles that I wasn’t very interested in. But one particular little book caught my eye & it was cheap ($1.00) so I decided to purchase it.

And as I walked inside a few things stood out to me.

(beware: complete honesty forthcoming)

I was wearing a small silver & diamond cross today.  It’s a very pretty cross. But I don’t wear it very often (mostly because I don’t wear jewelery hardly at all.) But for whatever reason I put it on today.

And as I was walking around inside this quite eclectic store, I found myself feeling self-conscious about that cross.

“What if the people in here think I’m just like every other Christian they know?”
“What if they have negative feelings about me being in here wearing that cross?”
“What if they’re offended by me wearing this ‘symbol of conservatissm?’ ”

(I realize that these thoughts are not even very sensical, but they’re just the things that came into my head. I warned you about the honesty, remember?)

And as I paid for my book (that ended up only costing 50 cents…which was great, but made me feel even worse about having to use my debit card to pay for it. It was bad when I had to use my debit card to pay for a $1 book….but something about having to use it to pay for a 50 cent book felt even dumber.)  Anyway….as I paid for this, the clerk asked the other gentleman in the store if he had found the bumper sticker he was looking for.

One of those “Coexist” bumper stickers. You know, like this.

And as I walked past the other customer (who was looking for the bumper sticker) I wondered what he saw when he saw that pretty silver cross around my neck.

Because hopefully he saw me through the eyes of the message in that bumper sticker.  I know my view before going in was a little foggy & clouded with my own judgments & pre-conceived notions about the store & the people in it. But the pleasant exchange I had with the people behind the counter left me wanting to stop by there again some time.
And now I have an interesting new book. And some things to think about.

If you happen to live in Tulsa, and happen to be looking for a place to live we might have a place for you (actually, our landlords might have a place for you). The apartment next to us is open, How about a tour:

There is a bedroom:

A dinning room:

A living room:

And a cool little sunroom thing:

Oh, there is a bathroom also. Where is the kitchen you ask? Well, that is the unique part. There is one kitchen for the two apartments. So, you would get to share a kitchen with us. That’s not to bad is it?

One of the best parts is the location right on Cherry Street. We can walk to Chimi’s, Jason’s Deli, Coffee Shop on Cherry Stree, Kilkinnys, Full Moon…the list goes on…in 5 minutes. We can walk downtown in 15, the bike trail goes right by our house, easy acess to the BA, Brookside is only a couple miles away.

If your interested let us know and we can get you in touch with our landlord. Rent is inexpensive, utilities are not bad, and it’s flexible, there is not a lease agreement as far as how long we will stay.

Let us know if your interested.

The other day I had the chance to meet a man who came to the church looking for help with rent. I ended up sitting at a table with him just talking. He had an amazing story.  He had done a bit of everything, from living in the woods with a bunch of wandering people, making drums for a living, carrying a cross around Salt lake City….he had done a lot of things in his life, the last 18 years of which he had spent in prison.  It was a pleasure to hear his story. I have to say I am a bit untrusting when i hear amazing stories of massive life change, I guess i have some cynic in me, but despite that it was encouraging to hear somebody talk of how God has meet them in a difficult time in life, and to hear his faith that God will provide in the future. The hard part now for him of course is finding a job. It’s hard for somebody who has committed a crime worthy of 18 years in prison to get a job.  I hope the right person is willing to take a risk on him, that somebody is willing to be part of a small redemptive work in Tulsa.

We carried out a 3 year tradition recently with our good friends Tom & Leah.

Cutting down a Christmas tree! We’ve learned a few lessons over the years about how to pick out that perfect tree. For instance, don’t go back to the tree farm that spray paints their trees green.

and pick out one that has been trimmed up a little bit more than this one.

We love the Burry/West Christmas tree hunting adventure tradition! 

I have prints of a few of my pictures that would love to sell to you. So, if your looking for Christmas presents not in the “mass produced bought at the big box” category here are some ideas for you. If you see a picture below you are interested in buying let me know. Ill tell you what size I have printed and we can work out payment. I have a bunch of pictures at www.poolhouseblack.com, most of which I can have prints made of, so if you see something there you like let me know. Here is what I already have prints of:

lights2:

white:

ice3:

eagle:

barn4:

ice2:

glow:

cows:

lake:

flower:

grinder:

color:

As part of our time in the CML we each have a project we will be working on. I finally picked mine…which took a while. I had several possibilites, the first one that i was drawn to was to begin working to start a coffee import business. For various reason i have decided not to do that right away…there are parts of being involved in a project like that which really interest me, so someday….you never know.

For my project i am going to try my hand at being a story teller. For a long time i have been fascinated by peoples stories. This American Life is one of my all time favorite things to do in my spare time. I have also always greatly  admired people who can go out and with boldness make people comfortable enough to open up to a stranger in front of the mic, pen, or camera and be real and honest. That is not a skill i have…honestly it goes against a lot of things that are really deep within me. So, i figure ill spend the next 9 or so months really out of my skill set and comfort and see if I can get some people to tell me where they come from, who they are, what they are doing, there dreams, struggles, and passions, let me document those things, and see if i can come up with some sort of finished product that is compelling enough to get people to care. I think there is a good chance i will fall flat on my face with this one.

I have not really fleshed this out yet…so i don’t know exactly what it will look like, but there are 2 basic types of stores i want to tell. First are stores of things that happen inside of the Green Country Event Center where we are working. So, for example i want to tell the story of Angel Food, the Food Pantry, AA, etc. The second story i want to tell are those of the people that live in the community around the church. It is a very diverse community, and i think there are a lot really interesting things to learn from the people who live nearby. So…there it is…now i just have to go actually talk to people…that is the scary part.

“For the Lord God Omnipotent Reigneth

Hallelujah

Hallelujah

Halle-lujah.”

We just got back from a presentation of Handel’s Messiah at a church just down the road from us (we walked!) & these are the lyrics going through my head. They’ll probably still be there when I wake up in the morning. It’s catchy, ya know?

We drive by the First Lutheran Church every day on our way home & noticed their sign outside, advertising their rendition of this Christmas classic. It wasn’t until reading the program that we realized that this is a long-standing tradition for this church, and other Lutheran churches in the area. This was actually the 89th year! They started in 1921! They even still use the same slides that were used in 1921 showing different paintings of Christ’s life. The First Lutheran Church started the presentation back in 1921 & in 1953, while they were temporarily without a church home, another Lutheran Church offered their sanctuary for the presentation & the choirs from both churches joined together to put together this timeless piece of music. And from there it was opened up to all Lutheran churches in the area. (I thought this was a cool story.)

Other thoughts on the evening…

• We sat about 3 rows behind an adorable 4-year-old who (with great gumption) did her best to direct the choir herself. With arms flailing she tried her darndest to direct them, but alas, they followed the conductor, as her parents gave her the “look.”
• (Background: The choir was dressed in “period” costumes. You know, normal Christmas Pageant outfits with the robes & cords tied around their waists & scarves over their heads.) Well there was an old lady in the chorus who was by my estimations in her 80s. I’m pretty sure she was wearing a bright pink bathrobe. With a little rope tied around her waist, so it looked mostly like the others. But it was definitely a bath robe. She was precious. I wonder how many years she’s been performing this with them.

It was a really fun way to be reminded of the most special time of year.

It seems that it is time for a blog post…but im not sure what to write about…so how about some random stuff:

a great movie: God Grew Tired of Us You really should see it. It is the true story of a group of The Lost Boys of Sudan who come to America as refuges. I think what was most fascinating about it to me was the conflict between the comfort and safety they found in the united states, and the pain of being taken out of their community.

Here is an interesting article about urban decay and potential renewal: Detroit

This one is for Cass: xkcd

This week I: picked a project, talked to a guy who just got out of prison, was asked if i was Jesus or homeless, bought a christmas tree, painted a lot, ate a lot of cookies, didnt ride my bike, designed a bulletin, worked on the beginnings of a new web site for CQMissional (which could be really cool…watch for it…), watched It’s a Wonderful Life. More on some of those things later.